is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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