I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
