Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
