nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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