The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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