Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
