Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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