So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
