I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
