Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
