I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Randomize
