What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
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