Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
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