At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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