Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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