I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
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