Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(708): View more from Illinois

A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.

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(718): View more from New York

You don't think I'm weird or immature right?

(917): View more from New York City

No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets

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(714): View more from California

im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me

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(847): View more from Illinois

Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.

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(416): View more from Toronto

Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.

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(305): View more from Florida

Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is

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(229): View more from Georgia

I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am

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(330): View more from Ohio

it wasnt that bad

(1-330): View more from Ohio

you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad

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(319): View more from Iowa

when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"

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