I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize