It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
