Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
