Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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