Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
