i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
