Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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