I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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