End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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