What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I'm like, not good at living.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
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