is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
