yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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