Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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