just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
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