On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
