I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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