I am puke
no. you can't hotbox the world.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
