ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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