He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Randomize
