Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
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