You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize