So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
