He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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