I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
