This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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