Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
