I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
