Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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