whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
