Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
