return my video game
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
