I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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