I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Randomize
