he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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