2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize